I decided to start a blog about the problems that I am having with my mother-in-law in hopes of finding out I am not the only person with this problem. Let me start out my telling you a little about what I like to call "the tumor". My mother-in-law is the type you hear all the horror stories about. She is mean, vindictive, bothersome, and rude. She is always stopping by without calling and intruding on our dinners, she tells me how I am doing things wrong, and criticizing how I parent in front of my daughter and step-daughter. Now this comes from a woman who had three children none of which she raised, but she has the nerve to tell me what I do wrong. I am home with my family every night, not out at the bars getting drunk like she did. I work hard..she lives off her daughters social security and her elderly mother who gives her money because she is too sorry to work.
My problems started about 2 1/2 years ago when she came over to our house and we were talking about some issue with my step-daughter and she was holding my 4 months old daughter and she got upset because I stated that I did not agree with her opinion on something and she stood up threw my daughter at me told me that I was F@#&*@ up and that I needed to learn how things were done in this family...which I guess means letting the kids do whatever they what and telling me what they are going to do...so of course I unleashed all my pent up anger at her. I kicked her out and told her not to ever come back. She then went home and scratched her arms up and said that I did it. Now I bite my nails all the way down so I would like to know how I scratched anything. It was three or four months before I let her see my daughter again. I felt bad because I had let my anger get the better of me. So I finally caved and let my husband take her to her house. Since then she has done nothing but talk about me behind my back and has also tried to turn all my husbands side of the family against me. So I feel uncomfortable around his family because I know she is always talking about me behind my back and lying about the things I do. Ever since then she still comes over without being invited and criticizes how I run my house. I feel like I am on eggshells around her because I can't even put my daughter and step daughter in time out without her having something to say about it. I have begged my husband to talk with her and tell her she is overstepping her bounds but he just says that's how mama is...well that may be but she is not my mother so I don't feel like I have to put up with it.
Tonight it all come to a head again. Our two daughters were playing with water and I told them to stop spraying each other...of course they didn't listen so I took the water toys aways from them and she jumped on my case about how mean I was and she didn't like how I was parenting. So basically I told her that she could leave if she didn't like it. She told me it was my husbands house I couldn't tell her what to do..the last time I checked I paid the bills here not her. So of course I let her get the best of me and I started to yell and scream at her...picture Jerry Springer without Jerry....lol...I guess it is helping to get this off my chest because I was definitely not laughing earlier. But I have told my husband that she is not welcome to ever come back unless she apologizes...I would love nothing more than to cut her out of out lives all together...I do not want my daughter to see her grandmother disrespect her mother and treat her badly. Any advice...or suggestions that might help. I hate having this tension in my family but I don't know what to do. I have tried it all...the good and the bad.
